My Diary

I refuse to be discouraged, To be sad, or to cry;
I refuse to be downhearted, and here’s the reason why:
I have a God who’s mighty, Who’s sovereign and supreme;
I have a God who loves me, and by grace I’m on His team.

He is all-wise and powerful. Jesus is His name;
Though everything is changeable, My God remains the same.
My God knows all that’s happening; Beginning to the end;
His presence is my comfort; He is my dearest Friend.

When sickness comes to weaken me, To bring my head down low,
I call upon my mighty God; Into His arms I go.
When circumstances threaten to rob me of my peace;
He draws me close unto His breast, Where all my strivings cease.

When my heart melts within me, and weakness takes control;
He gathers me into His arms, He soothes my heart and soul.
The great “I AM” is with me. My life is in His hand.
The “Son of the Lord” is my hope. It’s in His strength I stand.

I refuse to be defeated. My eyes are on my God;
He has promised to be with me, As through this life I trod.
I’m looking past all my circumstances, To Heaven’s throne above;
My prayers have reached the heart of God I’m resting in His love.

I give God thanks in everything. My eyes are on His face;
The battle’s His, the victory mine; He’ll help me win the race.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!!!!

To love you in the silence
From my heart and soul,
Is to understand that I would
Never be in your loving arms,
Nor in the embrace
Of the warmth of your body,
Nor in the heat of your flames.

To love you in the silence
From my heart and soul,
It’s to know that my love
For you is so secretly intense,
And is more then just a feeling,
It’s something that it will go beyond any boundaries
And only you could reach,
For only you, are the thief of my heart.

To love you in the silence
From my heart and soul,
It’s like cultivating an imaginary garden of roses,
That every day more and more,
My love grows stronger for you…
That each part of my bones
Is craving and yearning for your love.

To love you in the silence
From my heart and soul,
Is more then just a breath of air
That I need to live,
It’s me loving you, and missing you,
It’s wanting our to souls to unite,
And become one single soul.

To love you in the silence
From my heart and soul,
It’s carrying the cross of a love that is real,
That will climb any mountains,
And swim any oceans,
It’s wanting our love
To be deeper than the deep blue sea,
That I would go through any extremes,
To capture the love I feel for you,
I love you, with all my heart and soul.

Love sits and waits
Inside the empty void of the heart
Waiting for that special moment
That will light the spark

The one special person
That will take the place
Of the hurt in a heart
That will put a glow on a face

The one special touch
That will make you want to cry
And the one special kiss
That won’t let you say goodbye

I’m sitting here, waiting
For that one moment in time
When I will find my true love
Who will say to me, “You are mine”

For that touch and that kiss
That will never, ever end
For that one day I’m waiting for
When I say “I do” to my life-long best friend

So, I sit here waiting
If my dreams will come true
For, in every dream I dream
My “one special person” is you

I love you more than life itself
But I’m afraid to love.
My heart is like the fragile wings
Of a tiny little dove.

I’m scared to get too close.
I feel that I can’t win.
You’ll love me for a little while
Then you’ll set me free again.

I’ve lived so long on hopes and dreams
I don’t know what to do.
I don’t think I can trust my heart,
For it belongs to you.

I know you’ll only hurt me
Yet, I still keep running back.
Between the paths of our hearts
There’s a worn and beaten track.

You’ve got my heart held on a string.
It’s breaking right in two.
Enough belongs to me -to hurt-
The rest belongs to you.

I know that somewhere in your heart
There is a place for me.
I just don’t know how to find it
And there’s no way to make you see.

I can only hope that someday
You’ll wake up and you’ll find,
That while my heart belongs to yours,
Yours, too, belongs to mine.

When I close my eyes I dream of you.
Can’t sleep at night ’cause I wanna be with you.
Don’t want to live, don’t want to cry
Without you by my side.
When I go to sleep at night
I ask God to make my days bright.
I know he will do it - I know it is true.
Because he knows I only want to be with you.
I hear your voice inside my head.
I can imagine us together again.
I know it will happen - I know it is true;
Because I asked God if I can be with you.
I see you and I together again;
Holding hands and feeling the pain.
What a beautiful feeling - I wish it were true.
But I am only dreaming - dreaming of you.

Have you ever needed someone
To take the fragile pieces of your heart
And wrap careful hands
Deep within the cushioning cotton of his own?
Someone who can pull you close,
When you’re feeling so alone
Who speaks not a word,
But knows how to touch you
In that one special place
That lets you know you are still alive?
Someone who can look into your eyes
And see past the darkness
That has come to cloud your soul.
Someone who finds that one spark of caring,
Who nutures it back to life…
The one special someone
Who can wrap around you with his body
And give your soul a hug,
Your heart ease…

ku akui aku memang cemburu
setiap kali kudengar namanya kau sebut
tapi ku tak pernah bisa
melakukan apa yg seharusnya kulakukan
karena memang kau bukan milikku

ku akui aku merindukanmu
meski ternyata tak pernah kau merindukanku
tapi ku tak pernah bisa
melakukan apa yg seharusnya kuinginkan
karena memang kau bukan milikku

sesungguhnya ku tak rela
jika kau tetap bersama dirinya
hempaskan cinta yg kuberi

semampunya ku mencoba
tetap setia menjaga segalanya
demi cinta yg tak pernah berakhir

ku akui aku merindukanmu
meski ternyata tak pernah kau merindukanku
tapi ku tak pernah bisa
melakukan apa yg seharusnya kuinginkan
karena memang kau bukan milikku

kejujuran hati yg tak mungkin dapat ku pungkiri
keinginanku untuk kau tau isi hatiku
demi cinta yg tak pernah berakhir

Notice me, take my hand

Why are we strangers when

Our love is strong

Why carry on without me

Everytime I try to fly, I fall

Without my wings, I feel so small

I guess I need you, baby

And everytime I see you in my dreams

I see your face, it’s haunting me

I guess I need you, baby

I make believe that you are here

It’s the only way I see clear

What have I done

You seem to move on easy

And everytime I try to fly, I fall

Without my wings, I feel so small

I guess I need you, baby

And everytime I see you in my dreams

I see your face, you’re haunting me

I guess I need you, baby

I may have made it rain

Please forgive me

My weakness caused you pain

And this song’s my sorry

At night I pray

That soon your face will fade away

And everytime I try to fly, I fall

Without my wings, I feel so small

I guess I need you, baby

And everytime I see you in my dreams

I see your face, you’re haunting me

I guess I need you, baby

There’s a song that inside of my soul.

It’s the one that I’ve tried to write over and over again.

I’m awake in

the infinite cold, but you sing to me over and over and over again.

So I lay my head back down,

and I lift my hands and pray to be only yours

I pray to be only yours.

I know now you’re my

only hope.

Sing to me the song of the stars.

Of your galaxy dancing and laughing and laughing again.

When it feels like my dreams are

so far, sing to me of the plans that you have for me over again.

So I lay my head back down,

and I lift my hands and pray to be only yours

I pray to be only yours.

I know now you’re my

only hope.

I give you my destiny.

I’m giving you all of me.

I want your symphony.

Singing in all that I am.

At the top of my lungs,

I’m giving it back.

So I lay my head back down,

and I lift my hands and pray to be only yours

I pray to be only yours.

I know now you’re my

only hope.

mungkin org2 bakal bilang gw cw bego karna mau terus2an nunggu dia…tapi buat gw ini cuma masalah timing aja..when the time is perfect semuanya bakal berjalan lancar…
gw sayang bgt sama dia, gw ga bisa ngelupain dia gitu aja…tapi gw jg tau n sadar, kalo rasa itu ga pernah dibales ma dia…
well buat gw itu ga masalah, rasa sayang gw tulus ma dia…gw ga pernah minta balesan apa2 dr dia..kalo pada akhirnya gw ga jadi ma dia..ya gw anggap mang dia bukan jodoh gw. tapi buat saat ini, gw cuma pengen ngasih perhatian n rasa sayang gw cuma buat dia…terserah dia mo anggap itu cuma sebagai rasa persahabatan ato apa. gw ga perduli.
mungkin gw ga bakal bisa jadi ma dia..tapi dgn gw bisa ngobrol ma dia tiap hr, ketemu dia, canda2 ma dia, sms ato tlp2an ma dia tiap hr, dah ngebuat gw bersyukur, at least gw dikasi kesempatan buat bisa deket terus ma dia.
yang paling penting lagi buat gw, dia tau kalo gw bakal slalu ada buat dia, in gud n bad times, jadi kalo dia butuh gw kapan aja, gw bakal slalu ada. walopun pastinya dia cuma nganggep gw tmn aja…
buat gw cinta itu ga egois, dgn ngeliat dia happy sama pilihan hidupnya, gw jg harus ikut happy. tapi gw jg ga muna; sedih, kecewa, sakit pasti ada, tapi selama dia masih tetep jadi temen gw, ga akan ninggalin gw, gw masih harus tetep terseyum kan buat dia? lagipula ngeliat org yg kita sayang bahagia…udah seharusnya kita terseyum bareng ma dia..bukannya nangis kan?
jujur gw masih belum siap ma keadaan yg gw adepin skarang, kadang…gw masih suka ngehibur diri sendiri, dgn bilang, mungkin aja dia masih mo ngenal gw lebih deket ato yaaa hal2 kaya gitu deh
tapi deep down inside, loe jg tau, kalo itu semua bullshit. karna dia yaaa nganggep loe ga lebih dr seorang temen…
ironis bgt, kalo inget perhatian yg gw kasi melebihi sebagai tmn, ga mungkin deh dia ga ngerasa. tapi yaaa dia jg punya hak buat milih, apalagi milih yg lebih bae dr gw…n gw hargain semua keputusan dia.
pokoknya satu hal yg pasti..gw sayang bgt2 ma dia…makin hari rasa ini makin ga bisa gw tutup2in…tapi semua gw telen mentah2, karna ga mungkin gw bilang ke dia.n yg pasti lagi gw bakal slalu ada buat dia, gw bakal slalu nunggu dia…no matter what happen..gw slalu berharap yg terbae buat dia..n kalo suatu saat dia milih seseorang…gw berharap org itu bisa buat dia happy..dia yg terbae…itu lebih bisa bikin gw lega drpd gw tau kalo ternyata dia ga happy ma cw pilihannya…itu malah buat gw tambah sedih…
gw ga bisa ngasih apa2 buat dia…inilah gw…dgn segala kelebihan n kekurangan gw…yg pasti rasa sayang n perhatian gw yg tulus buat dia…ga akan pernah tergantikan oleh apapun…
hope u can feel it someday…coz i believe in miracle..n i do still have faith n hope for us…